Monday, November 14, 2011

Afternoon Out!

Yesterday S and I went on an afternoon date! YAYAYAYAY! We haven't been on a date in several months and it was so nice to be out with just the two of us! We went and had lunch at Chili's and then went to see Footloose.
While mommy and daddy were out enjoying our alone time, Miss K was here being entertained by three aunts and uncles and three cousins! She is so blessed to have so much family that loves her and wants to spend time with her! She was such a good girl for them and was such a happy little girl when we got home. I don't think she even missed us! Haha!

Saturday, November 12, 2011

attachment, self soothing, blah blah blah!

I have failed somewhere along the way to teach my daughter how to soothe herself. I don't know how or when but when this child is upset about something the ONLY way to calm her, is to nurse her. Which is heart-wrenching to a mommy who is attempting to do some weaning! If something wakes her up during a nap or in the night she is wide awake and there is nothing (NOTHING) I can do to calm her down, except nurse her. No amount of mommy shushing her, rocking her, telling her it will be ok, or back rubbing calms her down. It mostly just serves to piss her off even more. I don't know how we got here. Well, I do. I just can't imagine that I let it get here. I hoped that I could get her attached to something to help this process along. We tried a ribbie blanky, a stuffed animal, and a blanket, none of which she ever showed any interest in. We started putting them in her crib and putting my scent on them around 8 months and she could have cared less. I'm the only thing that can calm her. OH BOY!!

Am I the only mom who thinks things like "With the next baby I will do this, this and this" or "I have to remember to this differently next time so that we don't encounter 'X' situation"? I can't be, we have to learn from our "mistakes" right? Ugh. I hate writing posts like this because I feel like I'm admitting I was wrong, but I guess it's a growing and learning experience. Admitting I was wrong was never something I was good at before, I would fight to the bitter end, even knowing I was wrong just because I REFUSED to admit it. So I guess this is therapy! *wink, wink*

Monday, November 7, 2011

Have I told you??

Have I told you that I started a business not too long ago? I've been messing around making things for kids and decided to start putting it on facebook. So far I've been making tutu's, hair bows, holder for hair bows and some other things here and there. If you saw K-bugs birthday pictures you saw some of my work. I made her tutu, shirt, and her leggings! I'm pretty proud of it and have been enjoying it. So far I've made several bows for customers, seven tutu's and two hair bow holders! I'm loving every minute of it. Go check it out when you have some time. Click here to see The Littlest Ladybug. Of course the name was inspired by my sweet little "Bug"! <3

Sunday, November 6, 2011


So here's the deal. K is one year old now, she's still breastfed, and she is still getting up three to four times a night... OR MORE! I have loved breastfeeding. LOVED IT! It's been so amazing and I'm really not ready to completely give it up. I enjoy the bond that Bug and I have because of it and I adore the quiet few minutes that I get to snuggle my otherwise busy toddler. But (yes there is a but...) I need some sleep. I really, and truly need some sleep. I would be totally happy with one or even two times a night but four and five times is really just too much. I feel like a walking zombie most days and I cannot keep living on coffee.

My problem.... I don't know what to do.

I don't know anyone that has been in the same situation. My best friends little guy is an AMAZING sleeper and has been since he was tiny. My sister in laws son self weaned at around nine months and truly not many of my other friends breastfed. Those that did all had pretty good sleepers. So what's a momma to do? I've read 3 different books, I don't like or don't see where the "solutions" these books offer will work for our family.

So many books and even those I've talked to say to have dad go in and comfort the baby well the times we've tried this it just makes her so angry that we end up with an even bigger and longer fight on our hands. Not to mention S is a very, very heavy sleeper and needs his sleep, the man works 14+ hours a day for goodness sake! Another suggestion we've had from K's doctor and lots of other moms I know is to just let her cry herself back to sleep. Well, we've been doing that, for months and things aren't changing. I was told that in a week or so that they would realize they don't need you to put them back to sleep and they would go to sleep on their own. Well that doesn't work for us.

Then I get on breastfeeding websites and everyone's talking about how it's normal and fine. That all babies are different and it's OK if your baby doesn't sleep through the night until they're three, four, five years old. That it doesn't bother these mom's because they co-sleep, or they enjoy the snuggle time, etc... Well maybe I'm a bad mom, but I'm exhausted. My tiredness is affecting my ability to play and enjoy my child throughout the day. I'm resenting her for getting up so many times. I'm snapping at my husband when I truly don't mean to. I need some goddamn sleep! Like I said if I could get her down to 2 times a night I would be THRILLED. I honestly don't mind getting up twice, we did that for like a month before she reverted back to the schedule we have now and I loved it, I was better rested, happier person. I don't know what to do. I'm lost. Maybe I'm a bad mom, maybe I'm selfish, but I really don't think I'm asking for too much here.

So if you're out there, reading this (by the way if you've made it this far through that bumbling mess, kudos to you!!!) and you have tips for a sleep deprived momma who doesn't want to give up breastfeeding all together but just wants a few extra hours of sleep. Well then I want to hear from you... email me, comment, something to help a girl out!!

Saturday, November 5, 2011

Birthday Pictures!

Way back on September 27th we were supposed to have K's pictures and some family shots taken for her first birthday, but thanks to the ridiculous amounts of rain we've had this fall we had to reschedule the shoot about 3 times! FINALLY yesterday we managed to get them done. Despite the wind gusts and 40 degree temperatures K stuck it out like a trooper! Our photographer Brie Homer posted a sneak peak on her FB page if you want to check it here! While you're over there make sure you "like" her! She was so great with K and really brought out some cute smiles! Can't wait to see the rest of the pictures in a few weeks!

Friday, October 21, 2011

A MONTH! (picture heavy)

Good Lord, how has it been a month since the last time I was here? For two weeks I was without a computer, our darn cord shorted out or something and we couldn't get a charge. Before that I've just been so busy planning K-bugs birthday party I haven't had time to sit and think. I also started my own business, I don't think I've told you that before. Search for me on Facebook it's called The Littlest Ladybug. I make tutu's, bows, bow holders, etc...

Anyways I'm back and I promise not to ditch you all again, because I just know how much you can't live without me. (HAHA very funny, I'm sure like all of 5 people actually read this thing!) Let's see what I can catch you all up on... we still haven't had K's birthday pictures done, we've had to re-schedule about three times thanks to all this lovely weather. We did however get our own shots of her cake smash... FABULOUS!

On the 26th S and I celebrated our second anniversary! We got to go out to dinner, just the two of us! K stayed here at the farm with her Uncle Ian and Aunt Danielle. I think she has a blast, slept like a rock that night! We also finally have the living room done! Walls are painted, carpet is installed, and all the furniture is arranged just the way I want it. I still have things to hang on the walls but I haven't picked just where I want it all yet!

Like I mentioned this past Saturday was Bug's first birthday party. It was fantastic! She was blessed with so many of the people we love all around us and more gifts than we know what to do with! And if I may say so myself she looked completely precious in the outfit that I made for her!

Now, on to the pictures!!

Our new living room!
K-bug's new play area!
helping daddy put the legs on the couch!
Pumpkin Patch!

K and her cousins
princess in a pumpkin patch
"oooohh pumpkins!"

goofy girl!

K-Bugs First Birthday!

Birthday girl and I
Recordable story book from MomMom
Bug loving on some of her clothes
"What else is in the bag, mommy?"
kissing her LeapFrog Violet from mommy and daddy
Birthday Princess!
The Princes and her birthday feast!
this cupcake is yummy!
the cake and pumpkin cupcakes!
K sporting her birthday wardrobe all made by mommy!

Cake Smash Photo Session! 

Bring on the cake!
going for it!
Standing on her cake!

Friday, September 23, 2011

busy busy busy!

There's many exciting things going on around here!

Tomorrow my mom is coming up to help entertain the baby so that the painting in the living room can be finished. I am DYING to get this done and so anxious to see what it looks like up on the walls. Just the one coat of primer over top of the wooden paneling has made a drastic change in here. It was so dark and not much light gets to the back of the room because of it's shape and size. I also got the phone call today that the installers will be here on October 7th to put our carpet in. I can't even begin to tell you how elated I am by this! I was so worried they won't be able to fit us in before K's birthday party. And now I'll be able to show off my brand new living room :)

Sunday I am getting together with the SIL-A and BIL-B to do a mini-shoot of Bug. We're going to be doing a cake smash session and I am beyond excited about it! I know it won't be professional quality but between the three of us we have the potential to get some great shots!

Monday S and I will be married for 2 years! Crazy... it doesn't even seem like it's been that long. SIL-D has offered to keep K-bug and S and I are going to enjoy some alone time together. I have no idea what he has planned but it doesn't matter as long as we get some time alone. I love my daughter more than anything in this world but being a SAHM and having her be exclusively breastfed means there hasn't been much time at all over the past year when I haven't had her glued to my hip!

Tuesday is K's first birthday photo shoot with Brie Homer Photography (check out her work here, she's awesome!). I have been watching the weather religiously and so far it's not looking so well, I really hope we can get this in! Mother Nature if you're reading this give us some gorgeous fall weather on Tuesday, OK?

Sunday, September 18, 2011

4 teeth!

Bug now has 4 teeth! Of course much to my dismay it's the top right and then the next one over. So she's got two teeth on the top right and none on the top left! Looks like we may have a very crooked smile for her first birthday photo shoot next week! Oh well she's still stinking cute! :)

Yesterday my parents came up and helped me remove the rest of the old carpet that was in the living room. Now we are living on a linoleum floor with just an old carpet remnant in the part where the couch and t.v. are. I went today to Lowe's and picked out our new carpet. Nothing fancy just a tan-ish colored Stainmaster carpet. Hopefully it won't be too long before I get a phone call from Lowe's saying that their people are coming out to do the measurements and we can get the new carpet installed! I'm really excited!

I also picked up the paint for the living room and hope to get the one wall primed tonight after K-bug goes to bed! Hopefully the entire living room will be painted before the carpet guys come! So much going on but man I am just overjoyed that Bug will be able to crawl around in our ENTIRE living room and won't be stuck just in the small part we have cordoned off for her now! :)

Ohh! I almost forgot to tell you! She's also finally figured out how to clap! Momma's so proud!

Tuesday, September 13, 2011

11 Months Old!

K is... SO BIG!

Yay I am 11 months old today!! That's right, next month my sweet baby is going to be a whole year old! It doesn't seem possible that that much time has passed already. 

Lately she's been a ball of energy! Down to only two naps a day now, one at 11ish and another one around 4 o'clock, each of them lasting an hour. She hasn't taken any real steps since two weeks ago but I'm ok with that for now, I know she'll take off soon enough! Her newest skill, that she just learned yesterday is how to crawl up on the couch all by herself! Today she discovered the end tables on either side of the couch and has decided that removing all the items on there is her favorite pastime. It's most certainly not mine! I've had to shove our coffee table far away from the couch for fear she will fall backwards and hit her head. It's amazing how fast she can get up here, I've been trying to discourage it as much as possible but she's so quick!

My sweet little bug!

K now has three teeth, two on bottom and one on top! She's eating 3 solid meals a day and still nursing about 4 times. Not sure how much weight she's put on now but I think she's finally gaining some, anxious for her appointment next month to see if she's over 20lbs yet. She's still in mostly 6-9 month clothing, except for jeans, she needs 12 months. If the weather starts changing soon I'm going to have to go by her a new stack of fall clothes because all her fall things are still too big on her!

Look at those teeth!

Bug now signs all done and milk with intent. She will hand you whatever she has in her hand and when you say "Thank You" she signs it back to you! She says Da-Da and Ma-Ma (although this one usually only comes out when she's angry with me). She has also starting throwing kisses, and if you're really lucky you might get a big wet one right on the lips! 

No idea what this was about, but it made me laugh!

She is all the sudden very interested in books. Especially the ones that are touch and feel or make noise! She'll sit on the floor and flip through the pages for quite a while! She "Moo's" when you show her the cows in her farm book and giggles hysterically when you make the other animal sounds. She'll also throw her arms up in the air when you ask her how big she is! That's what she's doing in the first picture!

And I'll leave you with this silly face!

Friday, September 9, 2011

Flooding in my hometown

Tropical storm Lee has been dumping on Northeastern Pennsylvania for a few days, in fact today is the first day we've seen the sun all week. Lee pounded my hometown with close to 10 inches of rain in 2 days and the devastating pictures that are being sent to me on facebook are just heart-wrenching! The flood waters are actually higher in some areas than they were during hurricane Agnes back in 1972. There are videos on youtube uploaded by people who were standing on bridges in Mehoopany and Tunkhannock watching whole houses float down the river. I cannot even imagine what those poor families are going through. It's so hard to see all this and not be able to go home and help those in need, so many of the roads are washed out, unsafe and some are completely gone that I would need to take to get there. I just keep saying prayers for all of those in need and I hope you all will add in a few thoughts for these people when you say yours this week.

Here's some pictures from around the area taken by friends on facebook.

Looking down on the river bridge in Tunkhannock PA
Looking at downtown Tunkhannock
Anyone familiar with the area knows that Gays True Value floods quite often, but not usually like this
This is from today after much of the water went down, Mehoopany PA

Tuesday, September 6, 2011

First Steps!

Ladies and Gentlemen K took her first steps over the weekend! S's family was gathered at Dee's house for a surprise birthday party for MomMom. While we were waiting for her to arrive K took three steps from me to her cousin A who was bribing her with snacks! We even caught it on video, and as soon as I can get it from my BIL I will upload it on here so you can watch.

Our Labor Day weekend was packed full of events. Bugs MomMom's 60th birthday is today (If you're reading this MomMom... HAPPY BIRTHDAY!) so we decided to give her a party Saturday! It worked out so great, she had no idea it was coming, and we all had such a good time teasing her with "over the hill" presents and a birthday cake with exactly 60 candles on it! We got lots of pictures...

What's going on?
She couldn't believe we did that for her!

Pretty little Bug

Birthday Girl!
Our little walker!

Look what I got mom!
Looking out the window.

Cousins splashing in the rain!
Sunday we attended a memorial service for SIL's grandmother who passed away unexpectedly. Our thoughts and prayer have been with her family all week. Yesterday we had a Labor Day cookout at Dee's house again! Cooked burgers on the grill, some chicken and lots and lots of yummy side dishes! It was so nice to have most of the family together and enjoying the company of Miss Dee (who is practically family too)! Hope you all had a good weekend too!

Saturday, September 3, 2011

Weight Loss

I have written this post about a million and one times since Bug was born and each time I've gone to hit that "publish" button, I've chickened out! This time I have vowed not to, I need to write it, I need it out there in the world and I need to keep getting the support from those I know IRL and those I don't!

When I got pregnant with K I weighed 259 pounds. That's right, my little 5'3" self weighed that much! I hated it, but yet I did nothing about it either. I gained (thankfully) only 17 pounds while I was pregnant and when I gave birth I was 276. That was when the midwives told me that before I had another baby, if I wanted to deliver with them again, that I would need to lower my BMI drastically. The hospital had changed their policy in the last weeks of my pregnancy and they fought to keep me so that I wouldn't have to be switched to a high risk doctor for the last weeks. Before I get pregnant again I need to weigh less than 200 and preferably less than 190 or I would have to see a high risk doctor during my pregnancy and would have to deliver with them rather than my midwives. After my experience with the AMAZING group of midwives that I had, there is no way I'm having another baby without them. So, my journey started.

Given that I was breastfeeding, I had to keep my calorie intake at a certain level or fear loosing my supply, I couldn't make any drastic changes in my diet. It would have to be a slow, steady paced one. As soon as I had the clearance to start working out, I did. It wasn't much, just some stretching and Pilates in my living room. Remember I live in PA and gave birth in October, it was cold outside and I was going out there to walk! I will admit freely that I wasn't commited and my drive to excrise was lacking! I did a hit or miss exersie plan for most of the winter until the warmer weather kicked in. About March/April, I broke out the stroller and started walking up our hill and back (just over a mile). I huffed, and puffed but I stuck with it a few times a week until... well I just stopped. Over the spring/summer I did it off and on whenever the urge stuck me.

My diet, well I have to say, I haven't changed it much. I cut back on the sweets, I made a meal every night, and cut back on the soda and sugary drinks. I would go on kicks for about a week or so where I would eat healthier, but it never stuck. I honestly think the only thing that saved me was the breastfeeding, it burns some serious calories.

Over the summer, I discovered the world of Zumba! I LOVE it. LOVE IT, LOVE IT, LOVE IT! But I can't bring myself to do it when anyone else is in the house. My husband is one thing, but my father-in-law lives with us and the idea of him walking in and seeing me do it, is HORRIFYING!

Anyways, here we are, first week of September and I'm SO proud to say that I am down from 276 to 229. I have lost 47 pounds! I still have 41 more to go to reach my goal! However, my pants don't fit, my shirts hang off me  and I finally am starting to feel good. I notice a difference when I stand naked in front of the mirror, I notice a difference in my attitude, and most importantly I'm starting to feel like a woman again! Not just a blob, but like I have a figure! I know realistically I will never be the size 10, and 140lbs that I was back in high school (can you believe I thought I was fat back then?) but I will be so happy if I can trade in my size 24's for a size 16 (or less)! Right now I'm a 20 and they're getting loose!

So I charge out all out there, support me. Question me on where I am, tell me I'm looking better. Scold me if you must when I pick up a soda! Because the time is quickly approaching where I'm going to be ready for another baby, but I WILL NOT trade in my midwives! :)

Friday, September 2, 2011

Bug Signs!

When K-bug was about 5 and 1/2 months I started showing her some signs for things we do every day. She would smile at me when I did them and then move on with whatever activity we were doing. In the last month, I've really stepped up my game. Showing her the sign before, during and after whatever it was we were doing. Just into the first week of August she started signing "All Done".
I was shocked, she was using it in the right context, she was eating lunch and didn't want any more! In the next few weeks she would do it all the time for lots of different situations. She would be playing on the floor and start to get sleepy and would look up at me to sign that she was "all done" playing, then would crawl over to me and snuggle.

I was so excited about her signing that I started slacking on showing her other ones. So last week, Monday, I got her attention before we settled in for our nursing session and I showed her the sign for milk. She gave me a big grin and latched on to eat merrily. When she was done and I went to switch sides, she looked me right in the eyes and signed "milk"! S and I started laughing hysterically, of course it would take her no time flat to learn the sign for her favorite thing!

Jump forward to this morning. I was on the floor with her changing her diaper after she woke up and I had to open a new pack of wipes. Which means pulling out that little plastic piece that keeps them fresh. We got done and I got up to throw away the dirty diaper, but forgot to take the plastic piece with me. I walked back into the room and she was holding it out to me. I took it and signed "thank you" as I said the words. The little stinker did it right back at me! She's such a smart cookie, guess we'll be adding this one to our arsenal!

Want to see some of the signs we've been working on? I've been using this site to learn all the signs. I even printed them out, laminated them and keep them in a binder so we can refer back to them. I'm thinking about buying a cheap little photo album to keep them in the diaper bag so anyone who babysits knows what she's trying to tell them!

All Done:


Eat: On this site there is no sign for eat. So we used our own. I hold my hand like I'm going to make a shadow puppet duck (come on, you know you've all made shadow puppets on the wall), then I bring it to my mouth like I'm putting food in there.

No: This is a word that has become a staple in our vocab since Bug has become mobile and oh so curious of how the DVD player and TV work! Ughh!

Drink: We just started this one, since Bug has only had breastmilk from me up until recently. It hasn't had much impact yet since she's still not a huge fan of the sippy cup.

I'm going to start adding more signs as she masters these. I don't want to introduce too many at once, but since she's picking up on things so easily right now I want to take advantage of this quick learning! Next up is going to be diaper, tired/sleepy, mommy, daddy, dog, cat, I love you/love, happy, yes, please, bath and water. Not all in that order and not all at once of course!

Thursday, September 1, 2011


Every now and then, if you catch K in just the right mood and at the right time she will give you kisses! It's the cutest thing in the world, I LOVE IT! She's starting to show affection and it makes for a very happy mommy. Every once in a while when I'm laying on the couch or on the floor playing with her she will crawl over and lay her head on my lap. I rub her head and saw "Aww, what a sweet baby" and she looks up and smiles at me. Then repeats, it's like our cute little game. She's even started doing it with daddy. <3

Saturday, August 27, 2011

Teething is Evil

I am so ready for this tooth to be down and to stop hurting my sweet baby! She won't nap today and if she does it's for 20-30 minutes before she's awake again and crying in pain. I have tried ibuprofen, Hylands Teething Tablets, frozen teething rings, and partially frozen wet wash cloths and nothing is giving her more than a little bit of a reprieve. I feel so awful for her and awful for me too because I have no clean underwear and I can't seem to even get a load of laundry done! Haha!

I've been successful in distracting her for short amounts of time with soft foods and loud obnoxious toys, but like I said it's only a short distraction and she realizes it hurts again. I wish I could just kiss her and make her pain go away but she doesn't even want to snuggle me :(

Wednesday, August 24, 2011

first birthday sneak peak!

So here's a small sneak peak at one of the things I've made for Kaylee's birthday party! I'm really proud of this, it's my first tutu and I LOVED making it. Seriously thinking about starting up an Etsy shop with all the things I've been making.... hmmmm?

I do still want to add a pretty bow or something to fancy it up a bit, but how pretty is my little pumpkin going to be in this?!

Tuesday, August 23, 2011


I was just starting to wake up from a nap and the earth started shaking! I was telling S to stop shaking the bed and I looked around and no one was with me in the room. Ladies and Gentleman we just felt an earthquake all the way in Pennsylvania! CRAZY! Apparently a 5.9 magnitude earthquake just hit Virginia and we felt tremors all the way up here. Woke the baby up and everything she was crying in her crib.

Anyways, here's the pacifier leash that I made! So proud of it. Lots of posts to come this week on all the things I've been making!

Monday, August 22, 2011

3 teeth, birthdays, and a black eye!

Yesterday my parents came up in the morning so that my dad could see K-bug. They played on the floor with her for an hour or more! She loved it! While they were playing K started grinding her teeth so Grammie stuck her finger in there and found out Bug broke her 3rd tooth through! She now has two bottom ones and the top right. She's getting so big, I can't stand it!

In the afternoon we went up to Aunt A's house with the family to celebrate S's dads 63rd birthday! (If you're reading this HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!) Lots of yummy food and a pretty good cake made by yours truly! K loves playing with her cousins, they have so much fun together, plus the big kids love getting together too!

A Word of Caution:  you my blog friends... never ever get in the way of a 20 month old boy and his  
flying plastic toy microphone of doom!!

Or this is what you'll end up with...

Haha! My poor nephew didn't want to share his toys and decided to chuck his toy across the room which caught me right on the bone above my eye! OUCH!

Saturday, August 20, 2011

Spaghetti, yard sales, and Aunt Sissy!

Num Num Num!
 Bug got to have her first taste of spaghetti this week! My goodness it was hilarious! Needless to say she went straight to the tub after she was done!

Yard sales are AWESOME! We were heading out today when a friend/neighbor dropped in and was telling us about a yard sale some friends of hers from church were having up the road so we stopped up and checked it out. So happy I did. We got K-bug a mini kitchen that's in really good shape for two dollars (it was missing one small toy) and we also got her a little toolbox where you bop the shapes with a hammer and it tells you the shape and color! They're so cute and she loves them both!

Of course her favorite thing to do is sit on top of it! LOL

This past week S's sister came up from down-state to help watch Ian's kids while his wife was out of town and she got to spend some time here snuggling Bug. They adore one another!


Aunt Sissy showed me how to do the "Itsy Bitsy Spider"!